Tommy Darling (Live)

[Spoken]
So, yes, I don’t suppose you thought you were going to be hearing Miley Cyrus as you left your apartments tonight, ladies and gentlemen, and came to the Cafe Carlyle
In fact, I think that’s the first time that Miley Cyrus has been sung at the Cafe Carlyle
But I love - let’s hear it for Miley Cyrus
I think she’s great; I really like her. Uh, you know, I think she’s a good singer and everything, but also, I saw her one time on television being interviewed, and it was a time when there were all these little starlets and actors and movie, famous people all, like, bashing their cars into trees, and, you know, falling asleep at the wheel and getting DUIs and everything
And the, the guy on this talk show said to Miley, “What would you say to your peers, Miley?”
And she went, “You’re rich - get a driver.”
And I thought, I like you, Miley Cyrus
Anyway, um, last year was a big year for me, and not just because I went to do “Cabaret” again, but also because I was filming season six of “The Good Wife” at the same time
Oh, thank you
I know, it’s Eli. Yes, it’s Eli on stage right now with a Scottish accent. Isn’t it crazy?
Alicia, what the hell’s going on?
Actually, as I speak, ladies and gentlemen, the episode tonight - the mid-season finale - of, uh, “The Good Wife” is so fucking intense, and you want to see it
Do you want me to tell you and spoiler what happens?

[Crowd]
No!

[Spoken]
Cause I, uh, ooh, some people do, some don’t
How about those of you who don’t want to know put your fingers in your ears?
[?]
Um, okay, everyone got their fingers in their ears who don’t want to hear? Please. And look away because you might read my lips
Okay, so what happens tonight is, at the end of this episode tonight, I, Eli, goes tell Alicia that he deleted the voicemail when Will said he loved her
Okay, open your ears, open your ears. There you are
And guess what? It doesn’t go well
I could be, tomorrow, the most hated man in America
Bring it!
Uh, but also, um, in addition to doing “Cabaret” and doing “The Good Wife,” I also had a book out - I had my memoir out. It’s called “Not My Father’s Son.”
Oh, thank you very much
Yes, you may have heard of it. It’s a New York Times’ bestselling book, I know
And, in 2010, I, uh, did this BBC TV show called “Who Do You Think You Are?,” and I found out all this stuff about my grandfather, and they trace your genealogy. And I, I found out all this stuff about my granddad
He’s called Tommy Darling, and I found out he’d been this great big war hero
He was always a mystery in our family because he died in 1951 in Malaysia, and, uh, nobody knew why he hadn’t come back after the war
Mom said to me, “Oh, well, you know, darling, in those days, after the war, people didn’t get leave.”
I was like, for 6 years?
[?]
And, so, uh, so he never came back, never went back after the war
And then he died, and so I thought this show would be a really way to explain the mystery to my mom
And I actually remember thinking that the fact that BBC had asked me to do this show was the best thing that happened to me about being famous
Because I had all these resources, and all this research at my, uh, uh, fingertips because of the BBC
And I found out stuff about my granddad, and I realized it was the worst thing that ever happened to me about being famous
Because I found out that my granddad died in Malaysia in 1951 playing Russian Roulette
I know, right?
And I had to tell my mom that
And, and he was this war hero, and he’d been very damaged physically and mentally
And what really got me, though, was the way the British military treated him so badly
Because earlier in the TV show, I’d looked at his medical records, and all these pages were missing
And that was because after the war, he’d been made an officer
And, and, and when you were made an officer, if there was any hint of mental illness in your medical records, they ripped those pages out of the book
And so basically, the very institution that had caused these horrible problems for him, both mentally and physically, and ultimately, I think, why he ends up dying, you know, playing Russian Roulette, the same institution was heaping shame upon him for having had those, uh, symptoms in the first place
So that was really terrible, and I decided that after I found this all out, to do something to mark it and to make, do some sort of memorial for him
So I found this organisation in, out of Washington called Give an Hour
And what they do is, they give, you get, uh, they get all these mental health professionals, and they give an hour of their time to returning veterans from Iraq and Afghanistan and wherever else America has gone to war with next
And, well, a pattern is emerging. Come on, people, let’s face it
And, uh, then those, um, those war veterans in return give an hour of their time to uh, uh, public service of some kind, some volunteering
So I thought it was really lovely: everyone gets something, everyone gives something
So I had this, uh, little memorial thing, and I really felt good, I felt connected to him
I felt that if he’d had this kind of help when he was alive, he might not have done what he did
And I think, ‘cause I actually felt really connected to Tommy Darling, my granddad, because, um, you know, he obviously had PTSD and I feel like I,um, was a victim of PTSD, as well, from a different source. I’ll come to that later
It’s going to be a hilarious evening
(Laughs)
But, um
(Laughs)
In that same way as I did that memorial thing for him, I also wanted to mark him here tonight
So this is a song that is for all victims of PTSD; all, all, all the victims and the people who have been affected by war and, in this case, it’s about the Vietnam War