You'd Let Me Drown

My gut instinct has always been real good
So why could I not sense this mess, how could I not know you would
Fuck the first girl you found pretty
You'd choose a whore over someone witty, kind, and smart
Yet I fall apart
Now I've caught you in a loophole
We make the cycle end
I look at the clock, you look at it too
I look back at you, and you pretend
That I'm paranoid, another question you'd avoid
You know you're wrong, which makes it worse
How many times did you rehearse
The lie you told me, one too many times
You say I'm so sorry, it's not your fault it's mine
And of course I fall in love again, and face away from the signs
How do I keep doing this, I've built a world inside my bliss
But it ain't bliss it's blindness
You abuse my kindness
Now we're dancing with our swords
It's a metaphor of course
I slice once, a cut is made on your side
I know you lied, and so you force me
To feel guilty, it's quite a trick, it's one that works
I don't have to hold my breath
This battle is to the death
Make me cry, turn my tears to heroin
Shoot it up, now you're addicted to me crying
To get a fix, I know you'd go
As far as you would have to go
I don't want to fight this fight anymore
To get a fix I know you'd bring me down
To get a fix I know you'd let me drown
My gut instinct has never been put to use
I'm just worrying about results that haven't been produced
The tune I sing is just pretend, there's no relationship to mend
But I close my eyes again, back inside my world again
Now we're swinging 'round the Christmas tree
You'll never let me go
I've let you win, you know you've won
The fight is done, and I love you so
If I ever fell in love with someone underserving of
I know this is how it would go
He's horrible and I love him so
The boy in my nightmares
The boy of my nightmares