Someone Sponsor Me

[Lyrics stolen from Ben Visini's Bandcamp with the words for the SKIT]

[VERSE 1]
It seems like everybody here but me
Gets hit up by some kind of company
To read some ads and then get paid a bit of money
I think it's my time, I've got some money to make
And I'm so desperate for a slice of the cake
That the first offer that I get, no matter what I'm taking it

It's not a joke, no it's not a bit
I'll sign a contract and submit
Even if the product's shit

[Chorus]
Somebody give me lots of money for a deal
I'll say yes to any brand that sees that I've got mass appeal
My fans can't miss this steal
My loyalty has no doubt
I'll be a corporate sellout
Somebody sponsor me
Somebody sponsor me

[VERSE 2]
You're looking for somebody with flair, well I've got it
I'm perfectly capable of selling your product
I'll guilt trip my viewers into thinking that they really want it
(You know, if you were a real fan, you'd buy this)
You want sincerity, well I'm honest as fuck
You don't want any swearing, well you're shit out of luck
If you want somebody sexy, I'm right here, so call or text me

I'm not ashamed and I'm not afraid
To be up front in how my money is made
As long as I get paid
(how much do I get paid?)

[Chorus]
Somebody give me lots of money for a deal
I'll say yes to any brand that sees that I've got mass appeal
My fans can't miss this steal
My loyalty has no doubt
I'll be a corporate sellout
Somebody sponsor me
Somebody sponsor me

[BRIDGE]
I'll be the person that you want me to be
You'll get at least one sale, and it won't be from me
I guarantee that I never miss
My ad would sound a little something like this

[SKIT]
Hey guys, I just wanted to take a quick second to give a shout out to today's sponsor: [INSERT PRODUCT]
[INSERT PRODUCT] is exactly what you need to make [RELEVANT ACTIVITY] that much easier and that much more efficient
You know, I only take offers from brands I really trust
And let me tell you, I use [INSERT PRODUCT] almost every time I'm to do [RELEVANT ACTIVITY] and I don't think I can go back
Okay, personal story, check...
Um, oh! Promo code! (Silly sounds)
If you'd like to get the best offer you possibly could on the product
Please visit www.nameofwebsite.com/benvisini and you'll get 20% off your next purchase
Look at this dumb motherf*cker, he doesn't have [INSERT PRODUCT]!
Oh my god, how are you even living before?
Get your f*cking life together, jesus damn
Look, it's actually really hurtful, that you haven't even bought the product yet
I thought you were a fan, I guess you're not a fan
If this isn't clicking with you, the only thing you should be clicking is clicking the link down in the description
(Your crush will never love you back until you buy this product)
Again, that's www.nameofwebsite.com/benvisini
I hope that you guys enjoy

[Chorus]
Somebody give me lots of money for a deal
I'll say yes to any brand that sees that I've got mass appeal
My fans can't miss this steal
My loyalty has no doubt
I'll be a corporate sellout
Somebody sponsor me
Somebody sponsor me x a bunch of times