(Heartless) Hertie Gertie

[Verse 1]
I was up one morning
And much to my surprise
I picked up the morning paper
And right before my eyes
Had a two-page story
The words just wouldn't quit
It said, "Heartless a-Hertie Gertie
Was out to put the hurt on sticks"

[Chorus]
And it said, "Extra, extra, read all about it
Gertie got out today"
"Extra, extra, read all about it"
She was last seen headin' my way

[Post-Chorus]
In the morning, in the evening, yeah

[Verse 2]
Oh, I put on my tall coat
And I left my belongings behind
I just made 'em on this special
Arrived at the city on time
I turned around and I found me
Relieved in a crowd of three
And then, I saw the newsboy
A-shoutin' something at me

[Chorus]
And he said, "Extra, extra, read all about it
Gertie got out today"
"Extra, extra, read all about it"
She was last seen headin' my way, hey, yeah

[Post-Chorus]
Seems like I'm fadin'

[Verse 3]
Ooh, I can't hide forever
Though my life is mighty strange
I'm long waitin' my trial
For my fad and indignity
She went away for six years
And wrote to me each day
And always headed the letters
Of the headlines of today

[Chorus]
And it said, "Extra, extra, read all about it
Gertie got out today"
"Extra, extra, read all about it"
She was last seen headin' my way

[Post-Chorus]
In the morning, in the evening

[Chorus]
"Extra, extra, read all about it
Gertie got out today"
"Extra, extra, read all about it"
She was last seen headin' my way, hey, yeah
"Extra, extra, read all about it
Gertie got out today"