Two Faces

Kyle Bates

Cold side of the pillow
Marking on my cheek:
Loyal in my cold life
So sadness doesn’t seep out
I go to drink
To warm my soul or whatever’s inside: frightened animal

When I’m cold I’m closed:
Someone broke my nose at night
Blood ran through the valleys of my face
Looking through the mirror
I couldn’t feel a thing:
Outside
Without meaning

The pillow’s warming now
Most flip it around
I want to feel the heat
Pass right through my cheek;
Flow to ocean dark and swirling
To thaw a self emerging

Face warm and yearning
Sun and meaning filling everything
And me
With love for everyone:
When I hurt others
I drink spilling meaning so I can sleep

“Two faces have been shown
In your reductive songs
You want simplicity
Bipolar binary
Inside more selves are swimming
Surfacing, it’s never ending.”

I sat watching the leaves
Blow in the autumn breeze
Thinking of that baby we almost had

A self created me
I drink for times when life’s beneath is shown
Burbling up, bursting the self I’ve known

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