Stealer

Ilia Kukava (Ilockey)

Yeah
That’s not my life
I have just invented it for people
Who have already decided to replace their lifetime with the last minute
Now it’s time to show them a bright side of a tragedy
I don’t want to leave them alone
I just want to show them a way
And prove them wrong

Nobody calls me and nobody wants to see me
It feels like this silence is gonna kill me
This endless loneliness will definitely make me freak
Cuz my dreams are gone only despair is in my spirit
I’ve lost everything that I inherited from my dad
No money no home I got only an empty bag
My girlfriend wants me no more this is so goddamn fact
That I don’t think even god is able to help me man
Life is a room I knocked on the wrong door
Is there a heaven in the sky or it was fake what I was told
I wish I could leave this planet and say goodbye to the world
I am in trouble but how long
I would never imagine if I went to hell so soon till the coming of my death
Childhood will never come back again when there was nothing I did care
Friend surrounded bliss bumped into deep distress
Now it causes silent anarchy please tell me if it’s fair

If the demon visits my body today
If the rest of the world thinks I must be in a grave
If I am so bad that even god has no mercy
I guess I have to get out from this fuckin place
I hear somebody is knocking on my brain
If everybody wants me to be so “safe”
Then I should open the door where is my key
I got problem even in my memory

Every morning I can’t wait till the next day come
I want my years to be like short film and to go fast
It’s like I am waiting for something in fact I wish this day was last
The harder I try to fasten the time the slower it walks out of spite
How long should I suffer from this cancer of soul
Somebody is knocking but I won’t open the door
I need just a hush and don’t wanna talk
Please, give me a chance to stay all alone (ok, they are gone)
All I can do now is to call my friend
I know it’s 3 p.m. but I want my pain to share with Greg
I guess nobody enjoys a midnight guest
I don’t need his answer – just a good ear to listen what I will tell
(CALLING) //////////////
Hello, Greg, I know it’s too late but I didn’t see you for a while (who the hell is now Greg)
How is your life going, how are your son and wife?
Nice to hear from you but… (switch off this fuckin’ phone and keep your job)
Do you remember the old times, when I called you bastard child, now I wanna apologize
Oh my God, call me when you wake up or --- die

If the demon visits my body today
If the rest of the world thinks I must be in a grave
If I am so bad that even god has no mercy
I guess I have to get out from this fuckin place
I hear somebody is knocking on my brain
If everybody wants me to be so “safe”
Then I should open the door where is my key
I don’t think midnight guests like when I cheat

How long Am I gonna talk with these metaphors?
Maybe till I don’t jump from this roof that I’m on
300 hundred-meter height must decide will I be alive or just gone
Depression in me is eating me alive I feel this predator
What will happen if I jump - I just can’t figure it out
As if I don’t want to jump but I see no way out
I feel like if I stop I will let myself down
Then this gives me another question if I die then who will be proud
Oh shit where is my mum? - I’ve not seen her for so long
If she was here she would show me her strong love
What will be her reaction, when she hears that I am no more?
Why do I think like I got limited time? - When I can think as much as I want
Maybe it’s better to abandon the past, start over and find new love, I’ll do my best
But do I deserve to live after what I’ve done I am still in a mess but not helpless
Right now the demon of suicide is an invited guest
Sorry honey, but this time I walk down the stairs

If the demon visits my body today
If the rest of the world thinks I must be in a grave
If I am so bad that even god has no mercy
I guess I have to get out from this fuckin place
I hear somebody is knocking on my brain
If everybody wants me to be so “safe”
Then I should open the door where is my key
Somebody is here I guess he steals

You just need 10 sec to think deeply in your heart to save yourself

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