Cara Mia

A blank notebook and a back pocket fade
You used to mock me
Sometimes I would cry when I was home later
You hurt my feelings
Why why why
Send it down in your notebook
My wannabe Harriet the spy

And some say your genius
Is in your madness
Will you get better
Then will you leave us?
How you mixed with the darkness
At such a young age
Until in your chemistry
Science and violence turned
Silence to rage

Why are you dreaming this,
One shoe off and a bridge to cross over
And where is your taxi fare,
Are you left by yourself or left by your lover?
For three nights straight now I dream I keep both of my shoes
But I've forgotten my lines
And I've misplaced my cues
And there's a sea full of faces and a show to go on,
And I'm struck mute at entrance with nothing to draw from

There were the secrets
The big bang and the bigger joke
You seem to know all of them
And injustice makes you red with choke
You love like your desperate
You don't know what love is
I thought if there was one thing I could give you
One thing I could give you,
Maybe it was this

With your head on the bed board
The anguished repeat
The sweat of our sadness
The twist of the sheets
I don't want what's best for you,
Where will I be when you've found it?
I pray a lot about these bad feelings inside
But I can't pray my way through or around it