Lingering Thoughts

I said goodbye to my final friend today
All I have left is a piece of my breath
And a place to hide-away
I've been lost inside the question, what's it cost?
I just sigh and say
Absolutely nothin' since this somethin' will become nothin' someday
Yeah, you know I'm right, but still, you fight
And I must ask why today
Yesterday's useless. Tomorrow's clueless
But still, why today?
When the rest have gave up and the best have slaved up
You still pound away
Is it 'cause you're dumb?
Is it 'cause you're numb?
What you know you'd never say
You're just my heart
Oh please don't start with all the art. It drives me gay
And no not faggot you weasely maggot
And no not happy
I mean astray
'Cause all these pompous buffoons did pray
But'd never say till the end of day
So fuck appearance cause interference is the real reason we stay
I mean it's all for show
So no one know
Your truest self
Don't seem yourself
You seem a mess
Like you're possessed
Hey, let me guess
It's just the stress
You wear your skin like it's a dress
While you address the deeping press
Then fall back on lies with such finesse
Say the Lord gave you happiness
I've been dreamin' of all these demons
It don't feel right
Yeah, I've been screamin' all through the evenin'
Until the morning light
I've been dreamin' of all these demons
It don't feel right
Yeah, I've been screamin' all through the evenin'
Until the morning light
They say I have problems with the Lord
But really I write these lines just cause I'm bored
We're awestruck by fake things on big billboards
Chasin' after finer things that we can't afford
I'm sure you're not surprised
So the slides straight ignored
You're talkin' signs
I'm talkin' lines that slice fine like swords
It's their design to confine
We enshrine all the whores
No more gendered or remembered than those who surrendered their hoard
And it's truly a fuckin' pity
No one cares unless it's pretty
While I'm deep in nitty-gritty
Tryin' to pass by the committee
With these nonsensical lines that I feel are rather witty
I've been told to dumb it down so it appeals to the whole city
But they can fuck that like the piggy from Black Mirror
As I gain popularity I see the business clearer
The waves are rather wicked and the rocks are getting nearer
But I'm the only captain and I'm confident I can steer her
Clear of the obstacles without a lighthouse
My mind is feelin' foggy
Think I might've passed out
I pray you'll understand even without belief in the Man
Time pass like sand always rough and goddamned
And I might forget these lines in the morning, but it's fine
They flow like the water
But only during nighttime
As my vocal cords are slaughtered cause they're always on the grind
My pen is getting itchy
Darkness always on my mind
I've been havin' bad dreams
So it seems they're nightmares
I've been up all night. Out of sight. In despair
Been in fear of blank walls cause all they do is just stare
Bugs are runnin' down the halls mockin' the state of affairs
I've been hearing dark voices
Mother's asking me to share
I just tell her it's my conscious 'cause I know she doesn't care
She's tried giving me away
To her, it's just a scare
'Cause they're tellin' me my parents are both having an affair
I've been dreamin' of all these demons
It don't feel right
Yeah, I've been screamin' all through the evenin'
Until the morning light
I've been dreamin' of all these demons
It don't feel right
Yeah, I've been screamin' all through the evenin'
Until the morning light