Blame on Me

Mama getting high up in the kitchen
Daddy wasn't there, yeah, he was missing
Nobody was there to even listen
I kept all my problems and
Kept my feelings hidden, yeah, yeah
And I put the blame on me
I put the blame on me, yeah
I put the blame on me

Only 10 years old i'm already numb, yeah
My heart's getting cold
Saw my mama getting weaker
Hurt me to my soul the only man she loved
How could he do this to his girl?
He put that pistol to her head
I swear he could've shot her dead
Man, that liquor made him evil
I swear that man ain't have no reason
That shit just turned him to a demon, yeah
Fast forward a couple years, I done turned 12
Living life one hell to the next hell
I got cousins touching me inappropriately
And don't nobody believe me when I tell
When you learn that your heroes ain't
No one to look up to
And the same people hurting you
Telling you they love you
Before too long, you start believing
That maybe you're the reason, yeah

Mama getting high up in the kitchen
Daddy wasn't there, yeah, he was missing
Nobody was there to even listen
I kept all my problems and
Kept my feelings hidden, yeah, yeah
And I put the blame on me
I put the blame on me, yeah
I put the blame on me

Age 14, left East St louis
New drama, but I really ain't new to it
Hear 'em laughing at lunchtime
And I'm the joke black and white
Was too black for the white folks
I can't do nothing 'bout my face
Feeling all out of place
Over something I can't control
Fuck is wrong with these people?
Or is it something wrong with me though? yeah
Age 16, life's still mean
Mama fell hard, needed rescuing
She got a new man, he told her simply
She could stay with him long
As she don't bring me
I guess she had to make a choice
Did what she had to do
Chose him over her own kid
I don't know what would make her do this
Gotta be something I did, ooh

Mama getting high up in the kitchen (Ayy)
Daddy wasn't there, yeah, he was missing
(Ayy)
Nobody was there to even listen (yeah, yeah)
I kept all my problems and
Kept my feelings hidden, yeah
(O oh)
And I put the blame on me (Blame on me)
I put the blame on me, yeah (O oh)
I put the blame on me (Blame on me)

I was homeless 'til I turned 18
Started living with a man I was dating
Last thing on my mind was graduating
All about survival and money making
I would sing to escape my reality
Just tryna play the cards God dealt me
Posted myself singing a song 'cause
It was on my heart
When it went viral, I was working in Walmart
(Ayy) i got a new start
Taking my pain, turning it into art
Turning bad times into hot sounds
For the first time, I'm where I belong
(Ayy, yeah, yeah) 20 now
Making moves, making money now
Rainy days hella sunny now
But every now and then I think about

Mama getting high up in the kitchen (Ayy)
Daddy wasn't there, yeah, he was missing
(Ayy)
Nobody was there to even listen (yeah, yeah)
I kept all my problems and
Kept my feelings hidden, yeah
(O oh)
And I put the blame on me (Blame on me)
I put the blame on me, yeah (O oh)
I put the blame on me (Blame on me)