Handball in Highbridge Park [Workshop]
[LINCOLN]
Handball in Highbridge Park
[LINCOLN AND BENNY]
Every Tuesday after dark
Ever since seventh grade
This is the only game we’ve played
[BENNY]
Lincoln, you should’ve been there
When we walked in there
Surrounded by woman in swimwear
Every single one of them was fine as hell!
[LINCOLN]
Serve the ball
[BENNY]
Yo, I said ladies—one at a time
There’s plenty of Benny for all of y’all!
[LINCOLN]
You’re a stud
[BENNY]
Lincoln, you should have stayed
Even Usnavi got laid
[LINCOLN]
I’ve been working on music like a madman
But this new song just doesn’t feel right
The open mic is soon and I gotta write this tune
So let me kick your ass and call it a night!
[BENNY]
Why don’t you sing me a song?
[LINCOLN]
No way in hell
[BENNY]
Well, then why don’t you tell me what’s wrong?
[LINCOLN]
Nothing’s wrong, I’m fine—
[BENNY]
No need to get all defensive
Damn I’m just saying, you seem kind of pensive
[LINCOLN]
So, what are your plans tonight?
[BENNY]
Probably drink some shoties with Usnavi at some club
Let’s go get wasted and dance
[LINCOLN]
Yeah right!
[BENNY]
Oh, you gotta see the bodies on the hotties at this club
You never come out and mingle
[LINCOLN]
(?)
[BENNY]
Then you complain that you’re single
Let’s get laid! What the hell is your problem?
You’re so lazy
[LINCOLN]
That’s not even true! I ain’t lazy
I’m waiting for the one who drives me crazy
I follow my heart and so should you!
[BENNY]
What?
[LINCOLN]
I’ve got my eye on this one special person but
She doesn’t know how I feel
[BENNY]
Yo, what’s her name?
[LINCOLN]
I’m staying quiet, until I’m sure it’s for real
[BENNY]
Is it that chick from the Manhattan mall?
[LINCOLN]
I’ll never tell
[BENNY]
No, it’s that girl from McDonald's
[LINCOLN]
The tall one? You’re crazy!
[BENNY]
If I win this game, will you tell me at all?
[LINCOLN]
Shut up and serve the ball!
[LINCOLN AND BENNY]
Handball in Highbridge Park
Every Tuesday after dark
You’ll hang your head in shame
After I beat you in this game
[LINCOLN]
I’mma kick your ass so hard, you’ll land in Cincinnati
[BENNY]
Yo, I’mma make you cry so hard you’ll look like Tammy Faye
[LINCOLN]
I’mma screw you so damn bad, you’d think I was your daddy
[BENNY]
…Let’s just play