Varsity Blues 2

So here we go again

I sink deeper
It's got me in the sleeper i feel nothing
Heart colder than a deep freezer
Numb to life so I'm numb to the pain
It's like it won't be happy
Till it drives me insane my brain
Minus serotonin won't let me see straight
Don't know where I'm going
Can't see the light
It's like it's got my eyes closed
And the pills that they give me
Just another blindfold i'm psycho
I can't sleep at night so
I read comic books
Play X-Box and write flows
That help you through the tough times
But when it gets rough who's gonna
Help me get through mines?
Mind tricks the body
Body thinks the minds crazy
But this sick mind makes
The kid rhyme amazing
Do I really want to curify?
Attempt to purify? Could that
Be career suicide?

They say I'm only good when
The session is depressing
So I crucify myself so that
You can learn a lesson
They say I'm at my best when
I'm at the most stressed out
It's like only see success when
I'm wrestling with doubt

Huh, here it come again
It's like I'm running then
I fall flat, He laugh and I'm stuck within
A nightmare, my darkest dreams
A night terror where they
Can't hear me scream
The crowd screaming, they going insane
They think I'm just rapping but
I'm really in pain
I'm so lame, stop drinking, stop smoking
Walking past women with their legs wide open
Heartbroken she left but I'm hoping
She come back so I can
Split her rib cage open
Backstage, overcome with emotion
Twisting up a smile while
My stomach does convulsions i feel sick
Once sober, feel sicker
Try to save my liver
Need to see the big picture
But praise be and pass me the elixir
Cause I seem to need liquor
Like a priest needs scriptures
The chapter reads verse 3: 16
While I toke on this smoke
Like a skitzo fiend aAAAAHHHHH
I'm in that mood again
Shadows on the sun, demons moving in
Room getting dark, attitude is grim
Only had a couple friends and I’m losing them
When the shit gets deep, all you do is swim
Cause your deepest blue could
Be your truest sin

They say I'm only good when
The session is depressing
So I crucify myself so that
You can learn a lesson
They say I'm at my best when
I'm at the most stressed out
It's like only see success when
I'm wrestling with doubt

I used to squab everyday
Homie I used to get down
These days I pull punches where I
Hear them talking shit now
I blow the steam off just
To get the dream off
These fools in the industry is
Thinking that it means 'soft'
Feeling like I need my pistol
If I shoot me a rapper
Does that make me official?
I got issues, but that's old news like
Back issues, I threw away them old shoes
Now stepping in a new direction
Giving you the last chapters
Of my Blues collection
With new success then, you loose affection
With friends you choose
You should use discretion
Friends become enemies and jealousy
Is an energy
That used to be love and love is too finicky
Tendencies is so suicidal
Talking bullets out the chamber with
Each of my recitals

They say I'm only good when
The session is depressing
So I crucify myself so that
You can learn a lesson
They say I'm at the best when
I'm at the most stressed out
It's like only see success when
I'm wrestling with doubt