My Sister in Jesus Christ

[Verse 1]
Draw me a picture
Give me a real big head
I don't say much
I think I might stay in bed
When everyone goes to church
I'll finally rest in peace
Lay real still under my covers
They'll think I am deceased
You got a big grin
You say "What's not to like?"
At the birthday party
Talking ears off left and right
Girlie, you got a buttercream film
Smeared over your overalls
Old folks eating out of your hand
Upstairs in the fellowship hall

[Chorus]
Mama don't raise no fools here
We got to rely on each othеr, my dear
When I'm short on sound advice
I'm counting on my sistеr in Jesus Christ

[Verse 2]
I got a girlfriend
She got a snakeskin purse
And a walk-in closet
Chock full of My Chemical Romance shirts
Told me about BDSM
Now I think I might burn in Hell
We're staying up all night
Writing dirty emails on AOL
You like the meathead
He's on the baseball team
Beat up the new kid
Recharge on a Cool Blue Gatorade IV
Told him about ozone hole
He's crying himself to sleep
Get him on the New York Times
That he may read and weep

[Chorus]
Mama don't raise no fools here
We got to rely on each other, my dear
When I'm short on sound advice
I'm counting on my sister in Jesus Christ

[Verse 3]
We had good times
We got more to come
We'll get real old
Melt down in the Florida sun
Live on Caribbean cruise
Lined up at that omelet bar
I'll get cheddar and spinach
You'll get caviar

[Chorus]
Mama don't raise no fools here
We got to rely on each other, my dear
When I'm short on sound advice
I'm counting on my sister in Jesus Christ