A Musical Apology

[Verse 1]
I didn't mean it when I said, "I hope
The cable in the elevator snaps
As you step on board"
And I was joking when I said
"I hope you crack your head
And get mangled by the downstairs revolving door"
And I was kidding when I said, "I hope
The number 103 bus
Hits and makes a pancake out of you"
I'm sorry, I'm sorry
Isn't it amazing what a woman in love will do?

[Verse 2]
And I really don't want to see your taxi
On the 59th Street Bridge
Flip over, crash through the rail
And I'd be sad if at the airport you were
Mistaken for a local sex offender
Arrested, beaten up, and thrown in jail
And I really don't want to see you get
Radiation poisoning from thе metal detectors
That all passеngers on foreign and domestic flights
Must go through
I'm sorry, forgive me
For all of the mean things I said to you

[Bridge]
You thought I didn't have a temper
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, surprise!
But I really don't want to see you
Dismembered by the marijuana-sniffing dogs
When a simple little nipping would suffice

[Verse 3]
And I'm sorry when I said, "I hope
The flight attendant spills scalding hot coffee on your lap
As you fly away from me"
And I'm sorry when I said
"I hope you break both legs
On the mountain while you ski"
And I'm sorry for all the nasty things
I said about your mother
Even though we both know they're true
I'm sorry, forgive me
I'm swallowing my pride
I'd feel so guilty if you died
I'm sorry but I'm still pissed at you