Bernice Bobs Her Hair
Neil Hannon
Bernice bobs her hair in the barber's in the square
All her new-found friends are there to see it done
Bernice bobs her hair
She's been driven to despair
'Cause her cousin doesn't care about anyone
Her hair was long
Her hair was dark
Her hair flowed down her back
And now it lies upon the floor
Bernice runs out the door
Marjorie had told her what to wear to the parties
Marjorie had told her what to say to the boys
Now Marjorie was jealous of her social advances
And presented her with this choice
"Bernice bob your hair
You've persistently declared this intention
Do you dare to disagree?"
So Bernice bobs her hair and is instantly ensnared
In the trap so well prepared by Marjorie