Forgiveness
Verse 1:
Family told me that to move on, I should forgive
What forgiveness will take away all the trauma that I’ve lived?
These abusive sights were not diluted, my memory’s clear
Won’t see other sides, this ain’t translucent, no empathy here
I forgave and I forgave, and all it did was ruin me
Pursuing moral superiority, they got through to me
I wanted everybody happy, not everybody deserve it
I don’t care that they ain’t perfect, the rose bush isn’t worth it
I don’t care if they have suffered, hard times ain’t an excuse
Manipulation flying loose, and you expect me to call truce
I got attacked by an adult, and yet I still get reprimanded
At the very least, expected my family to understand it
Common sense ain’t an excuse, “we’re all human” ain’t an excuse
Hard times ain’t an excuse, there ain’t no fucking excuse
Nothing justifies the things I went through, I can’t and won’t defend you
Perspective is brand new
Let it go, I won’t and can’t do
Chorus:
Lo and behold
I threw away another Friday night
A heart of gold
Can’t get me nowhere in the violet lights
I’ll never grow
If I can’t find a way to spend my time in ways that won’t kill me
Lo and behold
I threw away another Friday night
Never forgive myself
Verse 2:
Someone free me from this bed I lay in
Can someone weigh in, turn on my Switch, you playing?
Turn on my phone, everyone’s gone
These group chats, they don’t stay in
Like night’s before, I’m all alone
Come have dinner, I’ll pay it
I’ll do anything to disrupt your plans
Haunted by the shadows of one night stands
They were good fucks, ain’t wanna be friends
Swear when I look up, see the top of the deep end
I don’t know what to think anymore
Craving treatments that I can’t afford
Parents told me I should forgive more
Maybe then, my mood swings won’t be poor
I can’t change myself for me
How do you think I could change myself for you?
Chorus:
Lo and behold
I threw away another Friday night
A heart of gold
Can’t get me nowhere in the violet lights
I’ll never grow
If I can’t find a way to spend my time in ways that won’t kill me
Lo and behold
I threw away another Friday night
Never forgive myself