North Chameleon Soul (Ride Monologue)
I was in the winter of my life
And the men I met along the road were my only summer
At night, I fell asleep with visions of myself
Dancing and laughing and crying with them
Three years down the line of being on an endless world tour
And my memories of them were the only things that sustained me
And my only real happy times
I was a singer, not a very popular one
I once had dreams of becoming a beautiful poet
But upon an unfortunate series of events
Saw those dreams dashed and divided
Like a millions stars in the night sky
That I wished on over and over again, sparkling and broken
But I didn't really mind because I knew that
It takes getting everything
You ever wanted and then losing it
To know what true freedom is
When the people I used to know
Found out what I had been doing
How I had been living, they asked me why
But there's no use in talking to people who have a home
They have no idea what it's like to seek safety in other people
For home to be wherever you lie your head
I was always an unusual girl
My mother told me I had a chameleon soul
No moral compass pointing due North
No fixed personality
Just an inner indecisiveness
That was as wide and as wavering as the ocean
And if I said that I didn't plan
For it to turn out this way, I'd be lying
Because I was born to be the other woman
Who belonged to no one, who belonged to everyone
Who had nothing, who wanted everything
With a fire for every experience
And an obsession for freedom
That terrified me to the point that I couldn't even talk about
And pushed me to a nomadic point of madness
That both dazzled and dizzied me
Every night I used to pray that I'd find my people
And finally I did
On the open road
We had nothing to lose, nothing to gain
Nothing we desired anymore
Except to make our lives into a work of art
Live fast
Die young
Be wild
And have fun
I believe in the country America used to be
I believe in the person I want to become
I believe in the freedom of the open road
And my motto is the same as ever
I believe in the kindness of strangers
And when I'm at war with myself
I ride, I just ride
Who are you?
Are you in touch with all your darkest fantasies?
Have you created a life for yourself where you can experience them?
I have
I am fucking crazy
But I am free