Randolph Returns (Skit)
(Dial)
(Phone ringing)
[Vanessa]
Visionary Music Group, this is Vanessa speaking. How can I help you?
[Marty Randolph]
Hi, uh, I was just wondering, is Chris Zarou available right now?
[Vanessa]
Oh, I'm sorry. Chris is in a meeting with Barry White at the moment. Can I take a message?
[Marty Randolph]
Oh, no, no, that's alright. Um, is Logic there?
[Vanessa]
No. Logic isn't here
[Marty Randolph]
Oh, um... well, do you think, by chance, I could have his phone number, please?
[Vanessa]
His phone number?
[Marty Randolph]
Uh, yeah... well, I-I already had his number. It's not like that. I just... misplaced it...
[Vanessa]
Who is this?
[Marty Randolph]
Oh, um... My name's Marty, Marty Randolph
[Vanessa]
You can leave a message if you'd like
[Marty Randolph]
Yeah, I'm just gonna be one hundred percent honest with you... um, I need his number. Can you just give me Logic's number? Please? Please? Can you just gimme, gimme, gimme...
[Vanessa]
I'm sorry. I'm not allowed to divulge that information
[Marty Randolph]
No, what you don't understand, it's- its's not like you're divulging informa- I already had it. It's just...I need you to just open up your little black book and- and- Jesus Christ! C'mon!
[Vanessa]
Well, Mr. Randolph, there's nothing more I can do for you
[Marty Randolph]
Alright, bitch, you're gonna give me that fucking number right now! You're gonna loo- on your computer or book or whatever the hell you're looking at right now, and you're gonna give me his goddamn number, because he was supposed to sign with me, not Visionary and go do awesome things with Def Jam! What the fuck is that shit?
[Vanessa]
If you keep speaking to me like that, Marty, I'm gonna have to hang up on you
[Marty Randolph]
Oh yeah! Yeah, you're gonna hang up on me? You're gonna hang up on Marty Randolph? I da- no, I double-dog fucking dare ya', you slut! Now, gimme the number!
[Vanessa]
Visionary doesn't pay me enough money to deal with this shit!
[Marty Randolph]
Yeah? That's cause Visionary ain't shit! And you're not shit! And fucking Logic isn't shit! And I was supposed to have him first! He was supposed to sign his soul! Sell out! Just give me the number! Fuck!
[Vanessa]
Fuck you, and have a good day! (Hangs up phone)
[Marty Randolph]
... Hello? Eh- Have a good day