The Last Drag

Getting off drugs is so easy
When you're not really on them
But everyone thinks you're on them
And those same people think they're gonna save you

So, I'm on my way to redemption
And I'm hoping to be forgiven
I'm really so fucking sorry
But first I'm gonna throw myself the best detox party

This is my detox
This is my detox
This is my detox
This is my detox
And I'll cry if I want to
This is my detox
And I'll get high if I want to

This is my detox
Don't call it a vacation
I'm gonna detox through re-toxification
This is my metox 'cause it's all about me
Where is my pillbox? Need a few oxy

This is my detox
And I'll cry if I want to
This is my detox
And I'll get high if I want to
This is my detox
And I'll lie if I want to

This is my detox
I can do it without you
Whatever is broken
I can glue it without you
This is my detox
I'll get high if I want to
This is my detox

This is my detox (this is my detox)
This is my detox (this is my detox)
This is my detox (this is my detox)
This is my detox (this is my detox)
This is my detox
This is my detox
This is my detox

A pool powder party just before I get sick
Then a Mandy Mitchell brunch and a lithium picnic
A dozen of dommes, a few erotic dancers
Don't ask me the questions if you don't want the answers
I already told you that I'm not the one cheating
Sex is not the same as an intimate beating
This is my detox
I'll do whatever I want to
This is my detox
This is my detox
This is my detox
This is my detox
This is my detox

I'll feel nothing as I take my last drag
Snort the biggest pile
Put my head in a plastic bag
I don't wanna die, I just wanna disappear

I thought I was so transparent, but clearly, I'm so unclear
No one understands me, I doubt they ever will
So, I'll stay on the powder, the drink, and the pain pill
Get my shit in order and sign my last will, and testament
With resentment for the past forty-five years
I knew it was over and done for
When they stopped pickin' up the phone
Only your oldest and best friends can make you feel so alone

If I wasn't told it, so many times
I never would have thought
That it's not really a lie
If you never get caught

I had an addiction from years of affliction
More than occasional minor and major abrasions
Dysfunctional made up equations
That never made sense to a mathematician
Not an adult, an experienced kid on the spectrum
Who found a plectrum
And made it his scalpel for cutting his skin like virgin vinyl
Posing suicidal
This is my detox, this is what I deserve
This is a drilling a hole in the most sensitive nerve
And I don't really want it
But I want how it makes me
Love the terrible places it takes me
I love how it breaks me
'Cause now I'm only happy, when I am broken
When I am cokin'
When someone's choking me out
How are you supposed to go to rehabilitate?
How can you detox from pure uncut 'aine?

This is my detox
This is my detox
This is my detox
This is my detox
I'm through
This is my detox
From you