When I Turn off the Living Room Light

Who cares if you're Jewish and your breath smells of garlic
And your nose is a shiny red light
To me you are gorgeous and everything's right
When I turn off the living room light

Your clothes are old-fashioned, your knuckles are bony
Your hair looks a terrible sight
But I don't have to see you, the way that you are
When I turn off the living room light
When I turn off the living room light
I don't have to see you, the way that you are
When I turn off the living room light

Well it's not that you are ugly and I'm not being cruel
It helps me to relax, dear, it helps to keep me cool
Now I am not intending to make you feel ashamed
What's wrong in me pretending? 'Cause you can't help being plain

Your nose may be bulbous, your face may be spotty
Your skin may be wrinkled and tight
But I don't want to see you, the way that you are
So I turn off the living room light

We don't feel so ugly, we don't feel so draggy
We don't feel so twisted up tight
And we don't feel as ugly as we really are
When we turn off the living room light
When we turn off the living room light
We don't feel as ugly as we really are
When we turn off the living room light